Grateful for Goldens – My Thanksgiving article in “Bay Woof” Magazine

Grateful for Goldens: The Right Dogs at the Right Times

The other night I lay in bed, worrying. About the state of our world. About money and my dwindling resources. About my health, about how I’ll look when the dentist extracts four of my lower front teeth, and about how I’ll pay for it now that the Ryan White AIDS dental funds have been eliminated. About whether my recurring arthritis will ever let me exercise again. About whether this Supreme Court will nullify my marriage.

But that’s when I suddenly felt a wet nose pressing against my hand and opened my eyes to find a big furry head resting on the edge of the bed. And I knew that whatever happened, I still had Franklin, my handsome Golden Retriever, to calm me down and bring me comfort. After a few long strokes of that gentle head of his, I drifted off to sleep.

Sometimes I forget just how fortunate I’ve been with my Golden Retrievers. Since 1982 I have been blessed with a succession of these extraordinary creatures in my life. And I couldn’t be more grateful.

My first, Nicholas, was a dark blonde pup who opened my heart to unconditional love. Out in Golden Gate Park, I wound up and sent the tennis ball flying far down the field for him, and – despite years of my father saying I threw like a girl – I learned I could throw a ball after all. Similarly, my father’s voice was still in my head telling me I couldn’t accomplish anything when I took Nicholas to our first training classes with the SFSPCA out at the Armory. By the end of that year, Nicholas was so well behaved that friends often called asking if they could walk Nicholas around the Castro (it didn’t hurt that he was a boy magnet). Turns out I could accomplish something.

When my partner, Rick, was diagnosed with AIDS, Nicholas quickly became our in-house therapy dog. And after Rick died in 1987, it was Nicholas who got me out of bed in the morning and back to sleep at night. As my own health worsened, he still managed to bring moments of joy each day. If not for his loyalty and devotion, I wouldn’t be writing this article now.

My next dog, Willy, had bright golden eyes that seemed to glow at night. A free spirit, he spread his love to everyone he met. When HIV meds finally arrived and my health improved, Willy’s outgoing personality gave me the courage to sell the house that Rick and I had bought together and begin a fresh start. But not long after moving into my new home, Willy came into the bedroom and began pawing at my leg. What seemed like a sweet gesture at first turned out to be a lifesaving alert after I followed him to the kitchen – to find a fire on the stove! Sweet Willy had saved my life.

Once Willy passed, I decided to rescue a Golden to repay a little to the breed that had done so much for me. Morgan was an abused one-year-old Golden we found in Los Angeles who, not surprisingly, came with some issues. We started with a trainer/dog whisperer but soon discovered his whisper was not loud enough for our wild boy. Eventually, we came across a no-nonsense police officer who trained K-9 dogs. At first, I thought he was going to train Morgan. I was wrong. In fact, he trained me to train Morgan. And after two tries, Morgan was finally awarded his “Good Neighbor Certificate.”

Since he was a rescue, we had little idea what Morgan would eventually look like. To our wonderment, he grew into a gorgeous curly Golden with a wide smile. I called him the prettiest boy in the world. Morgan may have had a rough start, but we had many years of amazing adventures together. He passed away in my bed at the age of 14.5.

After losing Morgan I was deeply depressed. I couldn’t imagine replacing him. It almost felt as if I was mourning all my lost dogs at once – as if getting another dog would be some kind of betrayal.

Yet just six weeks later we had the opportunity to adopt Franklin, who needed a forever home. With his big nose and goofy smile, he has come to fill that hole in our hearts.

They say that the right dog will show up at the right time and I think that has been true for me throughout the years. All my Goldens have been the right dogs at exactly the right times in my life, whether I knew it or not.

They’ve been the best friends I could hope for. And in this season of giving thanks, I couldn’t be more grateful.